La Toya reclaims Queen of Pop throne

In news that will make Toy Soldiers weep tears of joy and relief, the pretty and talented Jackson sister has released new music for the first time in over a decade. It doesn't matter that the 6 of the 7 songs on La Toya's stunning autobiography soundtrack EP were recorded in 2002 and leaked in 2006. That's just how Toy rolls! "Starting Over" is the easily the best Jackson album since "Thriller" but the tracklist is a bit perplexing.

What the hell is "Mafia Style" doing on there instead of her iconic smash (in waiting) "Player"? I'm also gutted that Toy Toy's exquisite calypso anthem "Tropical Breeze" missed the cut but at least "No More Drama" and "Just Wanna Dance" - which, in true Toy style, has been mislabelled "Jut Wanna Dance" - were included! The highlight, however, has to be the legendary beauty's new song.

"Starting Over" raises pop music to glorious new heights that derivative flops like Janet could only dream of. While the rest of the music industry is busy recycling the 80s, La Toya revisits the mid-noughties with intentionally dated beats (lifted straight from her Star Ice jingle) and delivers exquisite lyrics like "say what you wanna say, just live your life straight or gay!" Lady Gaga could never.

Here is the full tracklist:

Mafia Style (Skit)
Should've Left You
No More Drama
Don't Want You No More
Free The World
Just Wanna Dance
Starting Over

"Starting Over (Songs Inspired By The Book)" is available to download now from Australian iTunes. Make sure to write a positive review when you buy it. I've already thrown in my 2 cents! To get an idea of the aural treat that awaits you, here's "Free The World" - La Toya's heartbreaking response to September 11. La Toya's Grammy nominated songwriting genius is on full display in this modern classic and her vocal makes Adele sound like Ashanti. Goodbye pretenders. The Queen is back!

A taste of La Toya

The first taste of La Toya's pioneering autobiography soundtrack EP is finally here! "Starting Over" sounds like it was recorded in 2003 - and it probably was - but that doesn't stop the future #1 smash (on the bubbling under of the Billboard dance radio airplay chart) from being one of the year's finest singles. I love the perky beat and Toy Toy's Grammy winning lyrical genius is on full display:

All on my own and I'm finally startin' over,
Tonight let's celebrate until I say this party's over

Janet who? And then there's the stunning breakdown that gives me shivers and an erection. You will well and truly feel her funk when the pope of pop unleashes the full power of her one octave range vocals and sassily sings:

I don't need no cure, there ain't no lookin' back
I don't need no cure, no I don't have regrets

Bring on the rest of the EP! I think we can safely say that La Toya has album and single of the year already in the bag. Listen to a preview of her next first hit below.

La Toya is finally startin' over - No, really.

I still remember the first time I heard La Toya's "Just Wanna Dance". It was late 2003. Kylie's "Slow" was number one and I was pretty much just listening to that track on repeat. Out of the blue I received an email saying Toy Toy was embarking on her 217th comeback and I spent the next few days hunting it down. When I finally found an mp3, I was almost too scared to play it. After the final nail in her career coffin otherwise known as "Stop In The Name Of Love", I was prepared for just about anything BUT the best pop song of the year. "Just Wanna Dance" - with its iconic gender-bending lyrics and catchy vocal hooks - became an internet sensation and when the song climbed all the way to number 13 (on the US club chart), it looked like La Toya was on the brink of scoring her very first hit. A mere 24 years after releasing her debut single!

Unfortunately, the legendarily inept Ja-Tail Records never got around to filming a video or releasing it or its equally amazing parent album "Startin' Over". To be honest, I thought the version that leaked in 2005 would be the closest we'll ever get to hearing it but Janet's prettier sister has promised the New York Post that it will hit iTunes by the end of 2011! As pigs flew over Ja-Tail HQ and hell froze over, La Toya revealed: "You are going to hear new music from me – because the fans keep asking for it. I'm doing an album called Startin' Over that I've been starting over forever! I'm going to put that out before the year is over and then I'm done with music."

Before you start weeping over the last sentence. I'd take it with a grain of salt. Toy Toy has music in her blood and I have a sneaking suspicion she'll still be showing hacks like Madonna how it's done for decades to come. It's also good to hear that the tracklist has changed and she's scrapped the urban vibe of the original "Startin' Over". Toy told her soldiers: "It's strictly dance – all about fun, the lyrics are very personal to me. Love Honor and Obey is about being homophobic in the world today. I don't get it why anyone discriminates. It's so the wrong way to live. It's what I feel inside – what I think. Everyone will love it."

This is too much. The Pope of Pop is about to release her first album in 16 years and plans to free the world from homophobia, one nightclub at a time! Read the amazing article here and re-live the worldwide smash that never quite happened (below). Toy Toy is officially back.