September Vs Agnes

I have to admit that I don't pay as much attention to the Swedish pop scene as I used to when titans like Olinda and Bionda ruled the scene. Unfortunately, those glory days are long gone and now we're stuck with a bunch of nobodies that have probably never fashioned a dildo from clay on national TV or started their own political party to promote a flop single. Shame. On the bright side, two of the more palatable Swedish divas are back with new tunes.

It took me a while to warm to Agnes but I eventually overcame her complete lack of personality to stan for songs like "Release Me" and "I Need You Now". Her new single dropped recently and it's slightly underwhelming in comparison to those gems. "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" follows the Agnes formula of pairing a powerhouse vocal with thundering dance beats but something is missing. I asked her Australian record label if they plan to release the song over here and they said "maybe". Neon is probably waiting to see if it works in the UK. Can I suggest a slight remix to tone down the Eurotrash factor? That usually works for September.

Speaking of my sultry Swedish lover, "Me And My Microphone" will soon be unleashed upon the British public if the new remixes that appeared in my inbox are any indication. I still love the song - it feels like it's been out for years - and hope it's a hit. The cute video should help. For the first time in her career, Petra looks like she was born after 1970. I love the dance routine and her beaming face makes me happy. "Love CPR" is a great album and deserves a second chance. A UK hit could be just what the doctor ordered. Pun intended! Anyway, compare the videos and let me know who is your favourite Swedish export.

VS

Tonje Langeteig & the single of the year!

Tonje Langeteig is my new religion. I know her awe-inspiring anthem "I Don't Wanna Be A Crappy Housewife" is already getting major coverage on the blogosphere but I would feel remiss in my duties as a connoisseur of fine trash if I didn't throw in my two cents. Tonje first came to fame on the Norwegian version of Dating In The Dark. Her stunning curves and magnetic charisma could not be denied and millions of gays across Scandinavia petitioned for the busty blond to revolutionise pop music. At least that's how I like to think it happened! Her debut single has been torn apart by the usual snobs but "I Don't Want To Be A Crappy Housewife" is genuinely amazing. This touching and insightful glimpse into the cruel lifecycle of Norwegian cougars will leave you questioning the meaning of life.

The highly philosophical diva begins the song by declaring "I woke up one morning and I thought I was young but no no no my youth was gone". I wonder if this was originally written with Madonna in mind. But I digress. Tonje then flees to the disco to avoid her empty existence as housewife but obviously pops a dud pill because she begins pondering her own mortality, singing "when I'm six feet under, when I'm dead - I don't want dirt on me but make up instead". Lady Gaga wishes she wrote that lyric! The video is equally amazing. Our heroine rocks up to the world's worst nightclub with a couple of dicey looking hookers in tow before dancing with her rent-a-rapper. Oh and if you think Tonje is all looks and no talent, just watch this stunning live rendition of "I Don't Wanna Be A Crappy Housewife". Now we know where Britney got the inspiration for her BBMA performances from! Download this masterpiece - complete with world's worst cover and spelling mistakes - from iTunes now.

Here comes Oh Land!

Chances are you know more about Oh Land than I do. The Danish diva has been getting major blog love for the best part of a year but, until recently, I didn't take much notice. My iPod is already full of overhyped Scandinavian nobodies and I wasn't prepared to take a punt on another epic fail like Lykke Li. But when a "Sun Of A Gun" promo arrived in my inbox last week, I thought I'd give it a spin to see what all the fuss is about. And I'm glad I did. Sounding like a cross between Feist's "1234" and Lenka's "The Show", Oh Land's breakout single is an instantly catchy pop gem that deserves to find a bigger audience. I love the overwhelming simplicity of "Sun Of A Gun". The producers show admirable restraint by letting the quirky vocal hooks and cute lyrics set the tone. It's so understated but I guarantee you'll be singing along by the end of the song. As far as I know it wasn't a huge hit in America - where she has decided to launch her album - but it has racked up over 10 million views on YouTube and her upcoming support slot on Sia's US tour should help. In the meantime, Oh land is finally being given a push in Europe - and then hopefully in Australia. Fingers crossed "Sun Of A Gun" takes off. Her image is great and the video is very pretty. I guess it's time to see if the rest of the album is any good!

Resuscitate Me, September's Back!

Praise La Toya the lord! Sweden's holy princess of pop has blessed us with yet another dose musical perfection. And no, I'm not talking about that "Body Talk" troll. As far as Scandipop divas are concerned, my heart will always belong to September. You see, we go way back. I first heard "Satellites" in 2005 and spent a fortune importing it from Europe. Petra's breathtaking talent had me hooked and for a while there, she was my little secret. That all changed when "Cry For You" exploded in the UK and eventually made its way to Australia. I distinctly remember attending the single launch in King's Cross, where a bored drag queen mimed the song to a half empty room of gays. Stunning promotion! The song somehow made it all the way to #14 and I thought September might succeed where Robyn had failed - at crossing over to mainstream but it wasn't to be.

Well, almost two years later, the Swedish siren is finally back with new material. I was smitten by "Resuscitate Me" from the first moment I heard it but the recently released video clip makes me love it even more. Penned by Cutfather, Jonas Jeberg and Lucas Secon (the team behind Kylie's "Get Outta My Way"), this is a return to the irresistibly exuberant pop of "In Orbit" - complete with a killer chorus and some of the cutest lyrics of 2010. Even the video is a triumph! After looking like a 45 year old housewife on drugs in the shameful debacle otherwise known as "Can't Get Over", September is looking hot again and works it for all she's worth. Hell, she even looks good in a coma! Fingers crossed "Resuscitate Me" gets an Australian release. The nation is crying out for some real talent!

Straight Up! - A Twink Anthem

Straight Up! first came to my attention back in April when they featured on Don't Stop The Pop. Back then Rob likened the Swedish twosome to Pay TV and Army Of Lovers - heady praise indeed! Their debut single definitely covered an arresting topic. An ode to young and pretty gays, "Twink" is a throbbing electro-pop anthem that goes where lesser acts fear to tread with stunning lyrics like "I pick a hunk I wanna fuck and then I get him drunk". Take that Adam Lambert, you soft cock! The thing is - I'd rather do Perez Hilton with the lights on than go near a hairless man-boy but I fully support the group's right to sing about whatever the fuck gets them hard. Think of this as the psycho-sexual bookend to Barb@zul's legendary bear anthem "I Don't Care"! Since April the Straight Up! boys have been busy recording new tracks and only just got around to releasing the video for "Twink". I wish I knew what to say about it. The clip (below) is a trash lover's wet dream but it also makes me want to find the nearest woman, get married and spend the rest of my life living a lie just to avoid ever watching it again. But that's me. I'm sure most of you will love it and I think the guy with the beard would be kinda hot if he stopped over-shaping his eyebrows! Don't get me wrong, I really like this band. I'll just listen to their future smash with my eyes closed. Now where's the link for that Barb@zul video again...

Medina's Addictive 3rd Single

When are people (outside of Denmark and Deutschland) finally going to get correct and jump on the Medina bandwagon? The Danish pop star has released two stunning singles and a brilliant English language debut album yet continues to wither in Robyn's overhyped shadow. It's so unfair because "You & I" would have been a worldwide smash for the Swedish troll but was roundly ignored outside Germany, where it became a much deserved top 10 hit. This is like Janet and La Toya all over again! Why must the pretty, talented one always come off second best? But I digress. Medina isn't going let something as insignificant as having no hits keep her down. The striking diva recently unveiled her third single and it's another throbbing electro-pop anthem with melancholy lyrics and laser sharp production. "Addiction" isn't as epic as "You & I" or quite as devastating as "Lonely" but it's a grower. I love the drugs metaphor and she works the bleak yet still catchy chorus for all it's worth. I really don't know why Medina is always so depressed but it kind of suits her. She is the Queen of pissed-off-and-over-it electro! The Danish delight also turns it out in the video. She plays a supermodel and spends most of the clip looking sad in a glamorous kind of way. "Addiction" is released physically in Germany on the 26th of November. A deluxe two disco edition of her album "Welcome To Medina" hits stores the same day. I want!

Watch "Addiction" HERE

Sorry, I couldn't find an embeddable link.

Sweden's Latest Trash Diva

The name Rebecca Stella might not mean anything to you (yet) but her face is probably familiar to most Scandipop fans. Stunning Bec first came to fame as one of the three buxom beauties chosen to front Swedish trash band Sunblock. Who will ever forget their cover of Robin Beck's "The First Time" or their amazing interpretation of Corona's "Baby Baby" - complete with low brow gay video? Since the demise of Sunblock, Rebecca has been a busy woman. She's become a blogging sensation in Sweden, modelled for Tierry Mugler and was rumoured to be fucking Darin for a while there. Oh and the blond beauty also found the time to record a slammin' electropop jam called "Swag In A Bag". Produced by Fireface, Bec's debut single is catchy in that slick Scandinavian way and boasts amazing lyrics like "poor to rich, rich to poor - get the Christian Dior, let's hit the store!" As you can tell it's extremely complex examination of the human condition. The crazy video (below) has been ridiculed by some but I think it's great. Why is every diva compared to Lady Gaga? She did not invent unflattering outfits and excessive eye make-up!

Introducing Sweden's New King of Pop

For Tommie

One of my very first posts on this blog - way back in December 2006 - was dedicated to Sweden's greatest living talent Bionda (sometimes known as Linda Rosing). For those of you who missed out on this amazing diva, her career highlights include fucking a guy on Big Brother, having plastic surgery live on TV, releasing a couple of amazing singles, going on tour but only performing three songs due to the crowd not being enthusiastic enough and starting her own political party to outlaw airbrushing in magazines. In other words, she was and most probably still is, a true renaissance woman! I guess you're wondering what Bionda has to do with Sweden's new King of Pop. Well, he used to be her boyfriend. Fadde Darwich is well known in Scandinavia for his stunning good looks and publicity whoring ways. Since leaving poor Bionda he's published an autobiography (that he didn't write), discovered Botox and somehow found the time to release his own breathtaking pop anthem! I thought Don Bennechi's crown as the King of Swedish pop would never be challenged but Fadde could be the man to snatch it. Living with Bionda obviously rubbed off on the irresistible hunk. "We Can Party" is the European summer jam of 2010. There's tacky faux RedOne production via the Vengaboys circa 1997, accordions and stunning lyrics like "Oh Oh, c'mon Sweden we can party". What more do you need? I'm just shocked that the Swedes didn't enter this at Eurovision. Fadde would have won in a landslide!

Robyn - Dancing On My Own

Damn Robyn. Just when I was about to write that bitch off, she goes and does this. And by 'this' I mean make a typically demented video for what is undeniably one of 2010's best tunes. In my last post I mentioned "Better Than Her" (stop laughing, haters!) and "All The Lovers" as early frontrunners for pop song of the year but I forgot about Sweden's favourite troll. As disappointed as I am by "Body Talk", I can't fault a single second of "Dancing On My Own". It's the bitter twin sister of "Be Mine". A sad, pathetic and all too human snapshot of a broken heart complete with a ball-tearing chorus and driving dance beats. The track cuts through me like a rusty chainsaw. I can identify with each and every line. So kudos to her for owning up to the level of crazy that we're all occasionally capable of. This is the Robyn that I know and love. The girl who isn't afraid to explore feelings and emotions within the context of an extremely catchy four minute pop song - not the pretentious artiste with a robot fetish. To celebrate the return to form of Sweden's third best singer, here are ten things to note about her latest video (below).

1. Cosmetic dentistry hasn't caught on in Sweden.
2. For once Robyn doesn't look like an extra from Lord of the Rings.
3. The styling is hot and she looks fucking sexy.
4. In fact, I think I'm going to try out that haircut. Only with a little less volume because I don't want to be hit on by lesbians. Any more than usual.
5. Kylie is no longer the worst dancer in pop.
6. For proof check out the hilarious dance routine at 1:30 mins. LOL.
7. Robyn is amazing in close-up. Her eyes and attitude scream superstar.
8. The scene where she's working across the dancefloor, stalking her ex-boyfriend is as beautiful as it is heartbreaking.
9. Fist pumps are the new jazz hands. Work it, Robyn!
10. Someone has clearly been watching "Papa Don't Preach".

"Dancing On My Own" has smash hit written all over it. The song is released on the 14th of June with remixes by Fred Falke and Michael Woods. As far as I'm concerned, it's worth buying for the cover (above) alone.

Elin Lanto - Tickles

A couple of days ago I wrote a review of Linda Sundblad's latest album that nobody read. It's probably for the best because I got on my Scandipop soapbox and trashed a bunch of Swedish pop stars. The thing is - I love Sweden. It's the country that gave the world Bionda and for that I am eternally grateful. I just don't believe that everything recorded in the land of Ikea is automatically amazing. Although this stunning performance could prove me wrong. One diva whose brilliance I can agree upon, however, is the lovely Elin Lanto. Her last single "Love Made Me Stupid" was the sad theme of my Valentine's Day post and I'm gagging to get my hands on her latest album. Elin is the anti-Robyn/Linda. She unapologetically makes cheesy pop tunes with a ball tearing chorus and catchy lyrics - usually accompanied by a saucy low budget video. Kind of like an even less credible September! "Tickles" is more of the same - just better. I absolutely adore the song and have been blasting it in the car for the past month. Don't tell anyone but I'm rather partial to the super gay Almighty remix. Anyway, the video debuted today and I had to post it. Elin rolls around in bed looking pretty. That's literally it. Oh and I finally get what tickles! Sometimes mine twitches when I think about it...