I have to admit that I don't pay as much attention to the Swedish pop scene as I used to when titans like Olinda and Bionda ruled the scene. Unfortunately, those glory days are long gone and now we're stuck with a bunch of nobodies that have probably never fashioned a dildo from clay on national TV or started their own political party to promote a flop single. Shame. On the bright side, two of the more palatable Swedish divas are back with new tunes.
It took me a while to warm to Agnes but I eventually overcame her complete lack of personality to stan for songs like "Release Me" and "I Need You Now". Her new single dropped recently and it's slightly underwhelming in comparison to those gems. "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" follows the Agnes formula of pairing a powerhouse vocal with thundering dance beats but something is missing. I asked her Australian record label if they plan to release the song over here and they said "maybe". Neon is probably waiting to see if it works in the UK. Can I suggest a slight remix to tone down the Eurotrash factor? That usually works for September.
Speaking of my sultry Swedish lover, "Me And My Microphone" will soon be unleashed upon the British public if the new remixes that appeared in my inbox are any indication. I still love the song - it feels like it's been out for years - and hope it's a hit. The cute video should help. For the first time in her career, Petra looks like she was born after 1970. I love the dance routine and her beaming face makes me happy. "Love CPR" is a great album and deserves a second chance. A UK hit could be just what the doctor ordered. Pun intended! Anyway, compare the videos and let me know who is your favourite Swedish export.
Praise La Toya the lord! Sweden's holy princess of pop has blessed us with yet another dose musical perfection. And no, I'm not talking about that "Body Talk" troll. As far as Scandipop divas are concerned, my heart will always belong to September. You see, we go way back. I first heard "Satellites" in 2005 and spent a fortune importing it from Europe. Petra's breathtaking talent had me hooked and for a while there, she was my little secret. That all changed when "Cry For You" exploded in the UK and eventually made its way to Australia. I distinctly remember attending the single launch in King's Cross, where a bored drag queen mimed the song to a half empty room of gays. Stunning promotion! The song somehow made it all the way to #14 and I thought September might succeed where Robyn had failed - at crossing over to mainstream but it wasn't to be.
Well, almost two years later, the Swedish siren is finally back with new material. I was smitten by "Resuscitate Me" from the first moment I heard it but the recently released video clip makes me love it even more. Penned by Cutfather, Jonas Jeberg and Lucas Secon (the team behind Kylie's "Get Outta My Way"), this is a return to the irresistibly exuberant pop of "In Orbit" - complete with a killer chorus and some of the cutest lyrics of 2010. Even the video is a triumph! After looking like a 45 year old housewife on drugs in the shameful debacle otherwise known as "Can't Get Over", September is looking hot again and works it for all she's worth. Hell, she even looks good in a coma! Fingers crossed "Resuscitate Me" gets an Australian release. The nation is crying out for some real talent!
Straight Up! first came to my attention back in April when they featured on Don't Stop The Pop. Back then Rob likened the Swedish twosome to Pay TV and Army Of Lovers - heady praise indeed! Their debut single definitely covered an arresting topic. An ode to young and pretty gays, "Twink" is a throbbing electro-pop anthem that goes where lesser acts fear to tread with stunning lyrics like "I pick a hunk I wanna fuck and then I get him drunk". Take that Adam Lambert, you soft cock! The thing is - I'd rather do Perez Hilton with the lights on than go near a hairless man-boy but I fully support the group's right to sing about whatever the fuck gets them hard. Think of this as the psycho-sexual bookend to Barb@zul's legendary bear anthem "I Don't Care"! Since April the Straight Up! boys have been busy recording new tracks and only just got around to releasing the video for "Twink". I wish I knew what to say about it. The clip (below) is a trash lover's wet dream but it also makes me want to find the nearest woman, get married and spend the rest of my life living a lie just to avoid ever watching it again. But that's me. I'm sure most of you will love it and I think the guy with the beard would be kinda hot if he stopped over-shaping his eyebrows! Don't get me wrong, I really like this band. I'll just listen to their future smash with my eyes closed. Now where's the link for that Barb@zul video again...
The name Rebecca Stella might not mean anything to you (yet) but her face is probably familiar to most Scandipop fans. Stunning Bec first came to fame as one of the three buxom beauties chosen to front Swedish trash band Sunblock. Who will ever forget their cover of Robin Beck's "The First Time" or their amazing interpretation of Corona's "Baby Baby" - complete with low brow gay video? Since the demise of Sunblock, Rebecca has been a busy woman. She's become a blogging sensation in Sweden, modelled for Tierry Mugler and was rumoured to be fucking Darin for a while there. Oh and the blond beauty also found the time to record a slammin' electropop jam called "Swag In A Bag". Produced by Fireface, Bec's debut single is catchy in that slick Scandinavian way and boasts amazing lyrics like "poor to rich, rich to poor - get the Christian Dior, let's hit the store!" As you can tell it's extremely complex examination of the human condition. The crazy video (below) has been ridiculed by some but I think it's great. Why is every diva compared to Lady Gaga? She did not invent unflattering outfits and excessive eye make-up!
Just when I was starting to fall in love with Robyn all over again thanks to the amazing re-worked version and hot remixes of "Hang With Me", part 2 of her "Body Talk" opus leaks and it's just as aimless and pretentious as the first. Fans are already working themselves into a frenzy - calling it a stunning return to form - but they are probably the same bitches that declared Kelis' "Flop Tone" the album of the year. Apart from the aforementioned lead single, nothing on "Body Talk Part 2" comes close to matching the genius of "Dancing On My Own". The 8 track disappointment is polluted by the same overproduced beats and deluded bragging that made the first installment such a bore. Frustratingly, I know the real Robyn is still in there somewhere. The lyrics to "Love Kills" mine the same rich vein of creativity that spawned "Bum Like You" and "Handle Me", while "Indestructible" ranks as one of the prettiest ballads the fading star has ever recorded. By the end of the "Body Talk" debacle, I have no doubt Robyn will have produced 10 tracks worthy of her stellar back catalogue but by then how many people will still care? Not many - if the first installment's not so lofty #47 chart peak in the UK is any indication.
In My Eyes - 5/10
"Body Talk Part 2" picks up where "Part 1" left off - with a thunderstorm of clinical bleeps and beeps. "In My Eyes" would make an interesting instrumental but the heavy beats smother the lyrics - turning it into a strangely lifeless listening experience. It's a shame because there's a nice song hiding in there. I like the sentiment and think the chorus has potential. The production just needed to be reigned back to showcase the subtle melody and Robyn's lovely vocal (when you can actually hear it). Not a promising start.
Include Me Out - 1/10
So I like the intro and the opening synth that hums like a dying bee. Unfortunately, it's all downhill from there. The production sounds like it was lifted straight off "The E.N.D." - which would normally be a compliment but this hip hop meets electro concoction is an epic fail. There is no discernible melody, the chorus is non-existent and the lyrics are a major embarrassment. "Can I get a bam bam for all of my whatchamacallits doin' whatever and with whoever they like?" FUCK OFF.
Hang With Me - 10/10
Sigh. The Robyn I spent 15 years worshipping makes a welcome return on this delicious anthem. I was incredibly harsh about the acoustic version of "Hang With Me" in my "Body Talk Part 1" review but it grew on me ruthlessly and the brilliant remixes eventually won me over (Avicii's stunning floorfiller is my favourite). Amazingly, this version is even better. The soaring production is epic and very reminiscent of "Dancing On My Own" without being derivative. It should be noted that this is a cover of a song Klas Åhlund wrote for Paola in 2002 but Robyn really makes it her own. She sounds amazing on this and I love how the lazer like synths and icy beats actually evoke emotion instead of suffocating it. Can't Robyn see that she is effortlessly cool when she just does her 'pop' thing without trying to be the next M.I.A./Uffie?
Love Kills - 9/10
And the award for the best new song on "Body Talk Part 2" goes to the fabulously accurate "Love Kills". I love the dark and slightly eerie production, while the lyrics are vintage Robyn. "If you're looking for love get a heart made of steel 'cause you know that love kills". Amen. Everything about this brooding anthem is fresh and original. It's not the most commercial track the Swedish diva has ever recorded but the chorus is positively hypnotic and the multitude of quirky hooks results in the album's catchiest tune. Consider this the "Dancehall Queen" of "Part 2". I'd love to know who produced it. I'll take a punt on Diplo.
We Dance to the Beat - 0/10
Noise.
Criminal Intent - 4/10
"Criminal Intent" is so bad it's almost good. Almost. Again the production is intricate and interesting but completely overpowers the lyrics - which is probably for the best in this case. Robyn needs to stop singing about ruling the dancefloor. Anyone who watched the "Dancing On My Own" video knows she's a worse dancer than Sophie Ellis-Bextor and please keep a lid on the dirty lyrics. The idea of Sweden's favourite troll engaging in any kind of erotic activity is enough to make me vomit.
U Should Know Better (featuring Snoop Dogg) - 6/10
Now this shit is tragic. Which is probably why I find it so endearing. Basically, Robyn and Snoop brag about how successful and cool they are. There's a lot of swearing and name dropping - not to mention some of the worst rhymes in recent musical history. For Robyn's sake, I really hope this is a piss take.
Indestructible (Acoustic Version) - 8/10
Given the 'acoustic version' label, I assume we'll be getting an electro version on "Body Talk Part 3". Fingers crossed because this is beautiful. I love a good Robyn ballad - unlike the vast majority of Swedish pop stars, she has a unique voice and really knows how to interpret a lyric - and "Indestructible" is one of the best she's recorded since "My Truth". The strings are lovely, while the gorgeous lyrics showcase the diva's softer side. "I never was smart with love, I let the bad ones in and the good ones go". A nice way to conclude the latest "Body Talk" disappointment.
"Body Talk Part 2" is released in the UK on the 6th of September. An Australian release will follow shortly thereafter if Modular can still be bothered given the grim chart performance of the first installment. In the meantime, revel in the brilliance of "Hang With Me" (below). I want a physical single with the Avicii remix!
I can barely breathe. My second favourite Swedish trash Queen (after Bionda) has deigned to bless the music world with a stunning new single and glamorous high budget video! Victoria Silvstedt is probably best known in Australia for her reality TV show My Perfect Life but before she became a professional fame whore, the multi-talented 1997 Playmate of the Year dabbled in lots of different things. She launched her own lingerie line, tried her luck as an actress in America and had a brief music career in Sweden. It's the latter that turned me into a fan. Her 1999 smash "Hello Hey" is legendary among trash connoisseurs for its sheer sonic brilliance and I'm glad the pop revolutionary is still churning out songs that show up her flop countrywoman Robyn as the sad, pathetic joke she's become. "Saturday Night" is an inspired cover of the Whigfield classic that showcases the diva's glorious autotuned vocals and unprecedented ability to talk her way through songs. Uffie is such a thief! I love the cheesy production and classy video. Victoria basically poses in a bikini, rides around on a yacht and dances in a club. Just another day for her then. Brace yourself for the fabulousness below.
One of my very first posts on this blog - way back in December 2006 - was dedicated to Sweden's greatest living talent Bionda (sometimes known as Linda Rosing). For those of you who missed out on this amazing diva, her career highlights include fucking a guy on Big Brother, having plastic surgery live on TV, releasing a couple of amazing singles, going on tour but only performing three songs due to the crowd not being enthusiastic enough and starting her own political party to outlaw airbrushing in magazines. In other words, she was and most probably still is, a true renaissance woman! I guess you're wondering what Bionda has to do with Sweden's new King of Pop. Well, he used to be her boyfriend. Fadde Darwich is well known in Scandinavia for his stunning good looks and publicity whoring ways. Since leaving poor Bionda he's published an autobiography (that he didn't write), discovered Botox and somehow found the time to release his own breathtaking pop anthem! I thought Don Bennechi's crown as the King of Swedish pop would never be challenged but Fadde could be the man to snatch it. Living with Bionda obviously rubbed off on the irresistible hunk. "We Can Party" is the European summer jam of 2010. There's tacky faux RedOne production via the Vengaboys circa 1997, accordions and stunning lyrics like "Oh Oh, c'mon Sweden we can party". What more do you need? I'm just shocked that the Swedes didn't enter this at Eurovision. Fadde would have won in a landslide!
Damn Robyn. Just when I was about to write that bitch off, she goes and does this. And by 'this' I mean make a typically demented video for what is undeniably one of 2010's best tunes. In my last post I mentioned "Better Than Her" (stop laughing, haters!) and "All The Lovers" as early frontrunners for pop song of the year but I forgot about Sweden's favourite troll. As disappointed as I am by "Body Talk", I can't fault a single second of "Dancing On My Own". It's the bitter twin sister of "Be Mine". A sad, pathetic and all too human snapshot of a broken heart complete with a ball-tearing chorus and driving dance beats. The track cuts through me like a rusty chainsaw. I can identify with each and every line. So kudos to her for owning up to the level of crazy that we're all occasionally capable of. This is the Robyn that I know and love. The girl who isn't afraid to explore feelings and emotions within the context of an extremely catchy four minute pop song - not the pretentious artiste with a robot fetish. To celebrate the return to form of Sweden's third best singer, here are ten things to note about her latest video (below).
1. Cosmetic dentistry hasn't caught on in Sweden. 2. For once Robyn doesn't look like an extra from Lord of the Rings. 3. The styling is hot and she looks fucking sexy. 4. In fact, I think I'm going to try out that haircut. Only with a little less volume because I don't want to be hit on by lesbians. Any more than usual. 5. Kylie is no longer the worst dancer in pop. 6. For proof check out the hilarious dance routine at 1:30 mins. LOL. 7. Robyn is amazing in close-up. Her eyes and attitude scream superstar. 8. The scene where she's working across the dancefloor, stalking her ex-boyfriend is as beautiful as it is heartbreaking. 9. Fist pumps are the new jazz hands. Work it, Robyn! 10. Someone has clearly been watching "Papa Don't Preach".
"Dancing On My Own" has smash hit written all over it. The song is released on the 14th of June with remixes by Fred Falke and Michael Woods. As far as I'm concerned, it's worth buying for the cover (above) alone.
A couple of days ago I wrote a review of Linda Sundblad's latest album that nobody read. It's probably for the best because I got on my Scandipop soapbox and trashed a bunch of Swedish pop stars. The thing is - I love Sweden. It's the country that gave the world Bionda and for that I am eternally grateful. I just don't believe that everything recorded in the land of Ikea is automatically amazing. Although this stunning performance could prove me wrong. One diva whose brilliance I can agree upon, however, is the lovely Elin Lanto. Her last single "Love Made Me Stupid" was the sad theme of my Valentine's Day post and I'm gagging to get my hands on her latest album. Elin is the anti-Robyn/Linda. She unapologetically makes cheesy pop tunes with a ball tearing chorus and catchy lyrics - usually accompanied by a saucy low budget video. Kind of like an even less credible September! "Tickles" is more of the same - just better. I absolutely adore the song and have been blasting it in the car for the past month. Don't tell anyone but I'm rather partial to the super gay Almighty remix. Anyway, the video debuted today and I had to post it. Elin rolls around in bed looking pretty. That's literally it. Oh and I finally get what tickles! Sometimes mine twitches when I think about it...
With Robyn momentarily dropping the ball with the hugely underwhelming crapfest otherwise known as "Body Talk", the most unlikely candidate has stepped in to snatch her Scandipop crown. Linda Sundblad has been doing the rounds for the past decade without ever making much of an impact outside Sweden. Her former band - Lambretta - even released a couple of singles in Australia but they never really took off. Despite being the tragic fag's No Doubt. The diva's debut solo album yielded a couple of huge hits at home but her quirky brand of pop proved too dark and challenging for the rest of Europe. So she went back to the drawing board and quietly came up with one of 2010's best albums. "Manifest" is a diamond in the rough. It's not perfect - the mix of sounds is perhaps a little too eclectic, a couple of the songs misfire badly and occasionally her lyrics don't make a lot of sense - but that's also what I love about it. Linda is not a graduate of Sweden's cookie cutter school of pop. She experiments with different genres, sings upbeat songs about suicide and dances around semi-naked in boxer shorts. While Robyn stuck rigidly to the same old sound, Linda threw caution to the wind and just did her own thing. The result is a rich collection of catchy pop tunes with grit and attitude. Scandinavia has been put on notice.
Intro (Choice) - 7/10
I hated this bizarre intro the first time I heard it. The song sounds like something from "Damita Jo" - complete with dodgy lyrics about feeling like a virgin and weird stopwatch sound effects. However, through some annoying twist of fate, the damn thing has wormed its way under my skin. I love the subtle chorus and the way Linda sexes up her vocal simultaneously makes me want to laugh and touch myself. Genuinely odd but memorable.
Making Out - 10/10
Max Martin dusts off his trusty pop/rock formula on this brilliant anthem. "Making Out" stands up to anything the super producer has crafted for P!nk or Kelly Clarkson. Speaking of Kelly, this sounds like a cross between "I Do Not Hook Up" and "Since U Been Gone" but that's not exactly a bad thing. The chorus is pure audio crack and Linda's voice sounds amazing against the explosion of guitars. That's not even mentioning the amazing lyrics - "we're fabulous and rich together, we could not look any better"! If this isn't released as a single, Linda needs to find a new record label.
Let's Dance - 9.5/10
The album's second single was a top 10 hit in Sweden, bettering the peak of "2 All My Girls" by more than 40 places. While I definitely prefer the latter, "Let's Dance" is something of a triumph. That is if you ignore the clunky intro. I honestly can't think of another genuinely great pop song with such a dire beginning. The first verse doesn't work at all - it's disjointed, sloppy and unsettling. But then that gorgeous chorus explodes in your ears and you really just don't give a shit. With a bit of editing this could be an international hit. "Let's Dance" is one hell of a hot mess.
It's Alright - 8.5/10
A lot of fans have compared this with Madonna's "Cherish" and they're spot on. Linda's anthem shares the same (sickly) sweet sentiment and unbearably cute production - courtesy of Johan "Kermit" Bobäck. If you love that old cunt's 90s classic (as much as I do), chances are you'll lap this shit up. The cynic in me wanted to hate the song's unabashed hopefulness and optimism but I was won over by the second verse and pretty much smitten by the end of it. "It's Alright" is musical Xanax. Just press play and feel the happiness start to spread.
Perfect Nobody - 7/10
Um, why is this shit the album's 3rd single? Ok that's a bit harsh. "Perfect Nobody" is a pleasant enough ballad - if you ignore the fact that it doesn't really make sense and is more than a little boring. I guess the involvement of Fibes, Oh Fibes! was the selling point but there are at least half a dozen better songs on "Manifest". I guess my problem with it is the chorus. The verses are quite pretty. I love Linda's subtle vocal delivery and the restrained production is nice. However, the chorus is totally overwrought and, more to the point, would you really want to be described as the "perfect nobody" by your lover? I think something got lost in translation...
2 All My Girls - 10/10
"2 All My Girls" featured on my best of 2009 countdown and got its own post late last year. 7 months have passed and Linda's anthem is still on high rotation on my iPod. Max Martin knows his way around a pop tune and this is the most original thing he has put his name to in years. It's big, bold and utterly addictive. And don't even get me started on the video (above). So fucking fierce! Despite the fact "2 All My Girls" barely scraped into the top 50 in Sweden (what do you expect from a nation that snacks on Plopp?), I firmly believe the song would be massive in Australia and the UK. It's tailor made for radio and lesbians would finally have a new anthem to grind to in Newtown. Girls, it's time to move on from "Sexy Bitch"!
Serotonin - 9/10
This is a massive fan favourite and it's easy to see why. Linda re-visits the 90s in all its trashtastic glory. I love the house-y (is that a word?) piano, adore the purposely dated synths and am pretty much sick for the daggy 'woah woahs' in the chorus. If you're going for a retro vibe, you might as well do it properly. And producer Johan Bobäck is clearly a connoisseur of the decade. "Serotonin" is a camp gem but it's more than just an exercise in kitsch. The song holds up as clever piece of pop music and would make a fantastic single. Just imagine the crimes against fashion Linda could commit in the video!
Suicide Girl - 7.5/10
Who else but Linda would pen a catchy pop tune about killing yourself? It sounds gruesome but this is an ironic swipe at attention seeking media whores. I like it - particularly the lyric "took too many pills and dialled 911 and now I'm playing cute in an ambulance!" - but it feels like a bit of a throwback to her last album. That said, it's almost obscenely catchy and Macho Psycho's bubbly production (the guys behind Vanessa Amorosi's "Hazardous album) is a lot of fun. I gave it an extra point for the spoken interlude at the end where Linda disses tourists and admits to being unfriendly.
Pick Up The Pieces - 8.5/10
Break up songs are usually depressing or annoyingly empowering but "Pick Up The Pieces" strikes a nice balance between the two. The verses are refreshingly raw and pathetic ("a broken heart is nothing new") before switching gears with a cute chorus about moving on. It's a bit disjointed and the 90s flavoured production is curious but the song works. I love Linda's voice on this. She doesn't have a huge set of pipes but she knows how to interpret lyrics beautifully. Strike this up as another gem.
Damage - 6.5/10
Linda explores faux urban beats on this slow groove. It reminds me of the album opener ("Choice") - only without the filthy lyrics. I wish the chorus was stronger and the lyrics meander without having very much to say. This is the closest thing to filler on "Manifest". And while "Damage" isn't particularly catchy or memorable, it's still better than two thirds of the shit on Robyn's "Body Talk". Fact.
History (featuring Kleerup) - 10/10
Kleerup is more shameless than Stargate and Ryan Tedder put together when it comes to recycling beats. I swear he's been pushing the shame shit on every diva from Robyn to Cyndi Lauper. The thing is - Andreas Kleerup is pop's most endearing one trick pony. "History" sounds like a cross between Cyndi's "Lay Me Down" and Titiyo's "Longing For Lullabies" but I can't think of universe where that is actually a bad thing. "History" is another icy electro-ballad with pretty lyrics and clinically precise production. And I love it.
Feel So Good (Bonus Track) - 7/10
Now this is just a piss take. Linda sings about bubblegum and demands to know "where the fucking show is". It's musical equivalent of drunken rant complete with eerie backing vocals, strange sound effects and beats straight outta 1997. Weird and more than a little wonderful. Which basically sums up the whole album.
"Manifest" has bombed thus far in Sweden. But I still live in hope that it will be picked up abroad. It doesn't seem right that dirty, old Velvet has a UK record deal - let alone a pointless pro like Gathania or the BWO homos. Linda Sundblad is quality and could really shake things up with this album. Hopefully, she gets a chance to prove that there's more to Sweden than Robyn.
Dear Kylie, all is forgiven. I thought "Aphrodite" was the worst cover of 2010 but "Body Talk Pt 1" raises ugliness to an artform. They say you shouldn't judge a book (or a CD) by its cover but this is one example where the exterior is unusually reflective of the content. It's cold, clinical, derivative (Sorry Robyn - Debbie Harry did it first way back in 1981) and absolutely desperate to be edgy. Unfortunately, the same goes for the music. Sweden's greatest export since ABBA has well and truly fucked up. "Body Talk Pt 1" isn't terrible but I expect so much more from Robyn and she only delivers the goods on a couple of songs. Not good enough. The very thing that made her different from all the nobodies to emerge from Scandinavia's conveyor belt of bland pop is noticeably absent from this not so hot mess - her heart. Robyn's gift is her ability to deliver an emotional sucker punch, usually camouflaged by killer beats and a catchy chorus. I can't believe the same woman who sang "Be Mine", "O Baby", "Giving You Back", "Blow My Mind" and "With Every Heartbeat" is content recording boring songs about robots and nightclubs. Fingers crossed she delivers the goods on Part 2 because I'd hate to see Robyn end up as washed up and creatively barren as Annie. Here is my review:
Don't Fucking Tell Me What To Do - 1/10
Great title, shame about the song. Robyn basically lists all the things that are pissing her off to some generic beats courtesy of Klas Åhlund (from Teddybears). Robyn loves to mix it up by throwing in the occasional oddity ("Konichiwa Bitches" springs to mind) but they are usually done with a sense of humour that is sadly missing from this deathly boring piece of shit.
Fembot - 4/10
Another song about a fucking robot. How cutting edge! Not only has this theme been done to death recently (by Kostas Kountas, Parralox, Gabriella Cilmi and Robyn herself among many others) - it's also been done infinitely better (see Margaret Berger and Marina & The Diamonds). "Fembot" is a just smug exercise in bad metaphors and irritatingly "hip" production. It's not clever or catchy. Just tired and pointless.
Dancing On My Own - 11/10
Just when I was ready to sell my Robyn collection on Ebay and wash my hands of the stupid Swedish troll for good, she comes up with this. "Dancing On My Own" is easily her best single since "Be Mine" and an early frontrunner for the year's best single. Everything about the Patrick Berger ("Jack U Off" and "Anytime U Like") produced gem is utter perfection. The lyrics are gut wrenching, Robyn actually sings for a change and the gloomy beats rain down with laser-like precision. It's dark and depressing yet simultaneously beautiful and uplifting. I feel every second of this anthem and fully expect it to be massive. "Dancing On My Own" is a very welcome reminder of just how good Robyn can be when she doesn't try to be something she's not. It's just a shame that such a spectacular song is housed on such a lousy album.
Cry When You Get Older - 7/10
Robyn re-visits the 80s on this cute little pop tune. I love the bouncy synths and unusually sweet lyrics ("love hurts when you do it right, you can cry when you get older"). This is the album's most straightforward pop song and should appeal to those of us who have been hanging around since the 90s. I feel that I've been a bit stingy with my 7/10 rating but this song reminds me of the mid-tempo synth pop on Gabriella Cilmi's "Ten" and I'm genuinely shocked to admit that Gabi did it better. Which makes me want to grab the nearest razor. Anyway, this is a smart choice for a future single.
Dancehall Queen - 8/10
When this leaked a couple of weeks ago along with "Fembot" and "None Of Dem", many fans dismissed it as the worst of the bunch. I totally disagree. "Dancehall Queen" is a bit of a grower but it's genuinely creative and innovative. I love how Diplo has re-created the raw and organic sound of reggae/dancehall music using synths and electronic beats. The song shouldn't work at all but it's strangely hypnotic and ultimately very catchy. It also the perfect vehicle for Robyn's fuck you attitude. I love her swagger on this. With any luck by the time Part 3 drops, there will be enough good material for one decent album.
None Of Dem - 6/10
This is probably the biggest disappointment on "Body Talk Pt 1". I love Röyksopp but they clearly don't know how to bring the best out of Robyn - as they previously proved on "The Girl & The Robot". "None Of Dem" isn't bad. It's just adequate filler. The production is epic but the song doesn't cover any new ground. Robyn just sings/talks about how hot she is (stop laughing!), while someone forgot to write a chorus. I'm sure the cool crowd will be uploading this as their new ring tone as I type. The rest of us will be too busy pressing 'skip'.
Hang With Me - 6/10
One of the most disturbing things about "Body Talk Pt 1" is just how little Robyn has evolved as an artist since 2005. This admittedly cute acoustic number is virtually interchangeable with "Eclipse" or "Robotboy". It's nice to actually hear some instruments and the lyrics are suitably pretty but it's all been done before and done considerably better.
Jag Vet en Dejlig Rosa - 1/10
Sanna Nielsen called and wants her act back.
"Body Talk Pt 1" is released in the UK on the 14th of June. As yet there is no Australian release date but Modular already have it on their release schedule, so it will be hitting local stores around the same time. I'm off to listen to "My Truth" on repeat to wash away the taste of this aural turd.
I have to admit that I don't pay as much attention to the Swedish pop scene as I used to when titans like Olinda and Bionda ruled the scene. Unfortunately, those glory days are long gone and now we're stuck with a bunch of nobodies that have probably never fashioned a dildo from clay on national TV or started their own political party to promote a flop single. Shame. On the bright side, two of the more palatable Swedish divas are back with new tunes.
